understandable.
coming from my experience with the psychiatric field, nothing really 'works'. you can talk until the cows come home, you can drown in chemicals and become another drone but at the end of the day, nothing is going to change you beside you. anything else is just going to mask it. that might sound cliche and obvious, but its real. what you surround yourself with, who you surround yourself with and what you partake in directly correlates with how you feel about yourself. some simple adjustments to your life style/personal life/ friends might be all that it really takes to get you smiling again.
id be lying if i said you didn't need anything. i think theres shit in your life you need to come to terms with and figure out. so consoling might be a good choice. i dont have the answers. but i do know that since i started being selfish, and taking care of me instead of everyone else, i've began to start doing things i need and i've cut out the shit that fogs up my life. its helped.
going in line with that, i've realized that your really bad for me. and this comes from love, for you and for myself when i say that lunch probably wont happen. i have nothing against you nor am i mad you, i've just finally understood the effect you have on me and its not something i need in my life.
i hope the best for you and i love you but this pattern of coming in and out of my life needs to stop.
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